Today I’m going to try and help you n!ggas out…you are about to have a problem bros. Summer is coming around, it’s getting hot outside and your girl doesn’t have school anymore to keep her busy. She is going to have a lot of time on her hands. Bro its about to be “I just want to be free and hang out with my friends” season. She is going to leave my dude. That’s alright tho, what you gotta do is STAY CALM.  Accept the sadness, you gon be sad, you probably gonna cry too when she leave. I’m gonna give you some tips on how to get over your unicorn leaving.

#1 – Soon as you realize its over, my nigga get on that Facebook app you have on your phone, go to her profile and click the unfriend button REAL STRONG. Whats about to happen on her facebook will have you thinking about suicide. If you don’t delete her off facebook, you will be at home one night drunk and go on her facebook…She got a picture with Charles from work at Happy Hour, she happy as shit kissing Charles on the cheek. You break down and feel like you bout to throw up.

#2 – If you have her friends on facebook, delete them bitches too. They don’t like you, they never did, they will do their best to shit on you.

#3 – Delete the number. Don’t text that bitch no more. You just gonna be feeling worse.

#4 – F*ck with the hoes. I f*cked like 4 hoes the month me and my ex broke up. I ended up feeling worse about that sh!t because they were hoes and not her, but you gotta stay calm. Can’t be out here single and not getting any pussy.  She probably getting f*cked by 3-4 n!ggas from School, Work and various other gatherings that she attends anyway.

#5 – Realize who your real friends are and kick it with them.  If they real n!ggas they’re gonna be real with you and tell you what my brother Lou told me …. “Bro I’m sorry but that b!tch don’t give a f*ck about you, you got to f*cking move on”…You aint really trying to hear that but that sh!t is the truth. Once you realize that b!tch don’t give a f*ck about you crying and dying you gon be aight.

#6 – Get drunk. Being drunk the best sh!t in the world anyway so just do it. But I’m telling you for the first few days you gon be at the club drunk as f*ck laughin while Cashin Out is playing.  You are gonna turn around and look at one of your homies and say “Man will you look at all these b!tches in here, I’m glad that b!tch left me”…You gon leave the club and your homies gonna go home and n!gga you will BREAKDOWN at your house looking at old pictures of your ex. Just crying.

#7 – N!gga you got 2 weeks of depression, don’t be a bitch.  After 2 weeks of going out, f*cking with a couple hoes, getting drunk you should be moving on to “Dope Sadness”…And Dope Sadness is the best sadness. Word to @NerdAtCoolTable and @Bbillions (Dope Sadness is when you just f*cking a lot of bitches and you have rita’s in hopeless places but you fake want a relationship.)

Those things are just some of the things that worked for me. Break ups are dope tho, you learn a lot about yourself and you become a f*cking machine after a b!tch break your heart. You just gonna be out here f*cking with the hoes, chillin. You will also save a lot of money because my n!gga you aint gonna want to eat for like 2-3 weeks. Your breakfast is gonna consist of RNB songs and tears.

Don’t worry about what that b!tch doing, she sucking d*cks that’s what she is doing man. That’s none of your business no more… she gone. Don’t try to think about her new relationship like “Man that new nigga aint even got a car, they aint gonna last”. That aint for you to think about, that b!tch gone and she aint coming back.

“Take that L dog…move on…delete that contact out your phone” – @IAMKRIS24

Before you know it she gonna text you in a few months and say some shit and you just hit her with “Who this?”…And fuck her world up.

But maybe not, she gon probably be a hoe by then.

You gon be aight tho

        yo today i come to you not as a bitter man but as a man that knows shit doesnt last. some shit just dont last forever and some shit shouldnt last forever. marriage, now that shit is SUPPOSE to last forever but some people arent willing to forgive or move on so they torment their spouse with guilt. In my opinion the one who is willing to forgive and forget is the mature one and doesnt need the other one if they going to live in misery anyway, they can keep theirselves company with their own self doubt & insecurities.

       im here today not just as an aint shit nigga but a nigga with guidance and with a stupid sense humor. people dont get me and wanna write me off ass crazy. its a thin line between genius and crazy & im not crazy anymore, when you get pass the crazy stage then you know youre destined for greatness n shit. So im going give you some basic tips n shit on going through a divorce & try to make you unsad cuz honestly the shit can have you  depressed and feel less than a man. And for the record I love women but this is not for them and I am not Steve Harvey, this is for my fellas.

*running chest bumps*

1) Take care of yourself & responsibilities.

      If you move out the house you’re gonna feel like a freed slave and wanna fuck pussy to ya dick sore. There’s nothing wrong with that but make sure you don’t fall in love with new pussy. You really shouldn’t open a new door until you closed the old one but different strokes for different folks. Try to stay away from partying especially if you a nigga that look good. Partying + alcohol + broken heart + plus badder bitches on ya dick = some shit you want but don’t need. I mean you can have fun to get over ya pain but becareful you don’t wanna move too fast, might end up in another fucked up situation. so chill on the partying if you didn’t plan the divorce out. You gon need all the extra bread you can stack especially if you got kids cuz these women throw child support on you so fast outta spite and wont even tell you. now the kids, the kids come 1st before everything & anything. They come before rebound pussy, clubbing, you finding you an apartment and whatever I didn’t list. If you’re a religious person then you know God is not gon bless you if you don’t take care of yours kids, straight up. So take care yourself but take care of them kids first if you can.

2) Rebound Pussy

      Ain’t nothing like new pussy but all pussy ain’t good pussy. The first chick you fuck probably ain’t gon be bout shit but a nut. She probably gon be a bitch you wouldn’t gal or a lonely chick with hella kids. Don’t get attached, you’re using her for her pussy so you can take out ya frustrations and pain from the evil bitch you just left or the woman you can’t get over but have to. Never raw the rebound pussy, bitches think just cuz you raw them that yall go together and that is far from the case. So you strap up & fuck her brains out she gon fall in love with the good dick you gon give her but you gotta wear a condom on ya heart too, don’t wanna catch feelings. Rebound pussy ain’t cuffable pussy.

3) Find resourceful ways to channel ya energy to ease ya mind

      An idle mind is the devil’s playground, find something to do my nigga. if you dont you gon find yourself set tripping down memory lane then you gon start thinking about how that new nigga fucking yo bitch and her swallowing his nut cuz she used to do it for you. you know women like to be all freaky & shit, pulling out all the tricks cuz she trying to keep and impress a nigga. so just come to the conclusion that she sucking dick while your kids are in the other room sleep or playing dance revolution or some shit, nothing you can do about it but cry like a lil hoe if you let it bother you. so go to gym, get buff so the new bitches can be all on ya dick and just for the simple fact of getting swole cuz you might wanna beat that new nigga up. if you dont like weight lifting stimulate ya mind with a good book preferably the bible cuz you gon feel lost and hopeless sometimes so you gotta get ya faith up. aslong as you can keep yourself outchea feelings til you over her the better off you’ll be.

4) Cut all ties (even with mutuals friends who aint neutral)

       ok by the time the divorce is finalized yo name has been slandered and shitted on so many times that it becomes funny when you hear the shit that has been said about you but when you see her she so got damn fake in ya face its ridiculous. i mean if you gon talk behind a nigga back and hate him & shit, do it in his face too. im just saying. now when you come around for functions you getting shady looks, weak handshakes, just a bunch of people being fake as fuck. you dont need that shit, fuck all them people. wont none of them square up & fight so fuck it, theyre hoes so let em hate.

5) Cry

      aint shit much to say about this one, if you hurt then youre hurt. holding that shit in will drive you crazy and its ok for us men to cry, we cant be hard and gangsta all the time. cry nigga cry, go cry on yo new chick shoulder that looks 10X better, bet she fuck you good cuz she want you to get over that bitch anyway. she’ll use ya tears for lube lol

Treal nigga out…..